Capstone

I'm taking a course to finish up my associates degree and it's called a capstone. Essentially the purpose of this course is to show what I've learned through my general education at the community college that I'm currently going to. The assignment for this entire class is a project. And that's basically it. Most people, including myself were confused by the excessively vague directions. There is no rubric, no common goal other than to show what we've learned through out our college careers and use those skills to develop and entire project. At first I was completely lost, how on Earth am I ever going to pick a topic when the possibilities are endless. But I talked to my mom, she understands the way that I think and when I told her about the assignment she knew I was completely lost with such a broad range of potential but she came up with an awesome idea. "Surviving Deployment." This isn't my first deployment and it probably won't be my last but each has it's own difficulties, it's own struggles and set backs. And I immediately began coming up with ideas. I knew what I could do, the options and where I could take this assignment was really fascinating and I was excited. I would write a blog. I'd already had a few written from when I'd originally gotten my tablet and downloaded the Blogger app but I was too intimidated to post any of them. Hence why some of them are from back in February or March but have Updates that I've written. They aren't much, the grammar is lacking and since the Blogger app doesn't really show spelling mistakes that's definitely apparent throughout the earlier posts but instead from now on I'm going to type them in pages and then paste them into Blogger and add pictures and or videos from there. This is exciting for me, and I don't plan on stopping just because my course ends. I have a lot to say and sometimes decent advice, especially for those going through their very first deployment. This is my second and although I face many of the same challenges I can see the light at the end of the rainbow more clearly and I know more about what to expect and how to handle certain situations. No one is perfect though, especially not me. I'm hard headed, I don't make friends very well, I talk A LOT (too much for some peoples liking) and I'm very opinionated. But if you'd like honestly, someone that won't sugar coat this, someone that won't tell you that it's easy and you'll get through it and be strong every day and that they'll "be home before you know it" then I encourage you to read this, write comments, ask questions because honestly most of those military support pages won't tell you the truth, they'll feed you best wishes and a whole bunch of opinions but they don't want you to know that crying yourself to sleep in a bed alone, clutching their pillow after 2 months wishing something in your house still smelled like them is normal and to expect it. They won't tell you that you have to put your big girl panties on and get out of the house the FIRST day in order to keep yourself from falling into a depression and staying in bed eating butterfingers and drinking Dr. Pepper all day while watching marathons of Netflix shows, mine was Grey's Anatomy. It's okay, but it's easy to go from okay to not answering your phone and not coming out of your room. Essentially refusing to face the world. But one thing I remind myself in the worst of times is that deployments always end. No matter what it will end, your SO will come home and you can return to your strange lives together. I won't say "life as normal" because heck what's normal anyways, well I look forward to this project and hopefully learning more about myself in the process. 

Any Day But Today,

Kayla